Home > Apple, Idiots > D8 Exclusive! Steve Jobs uses nouns, verbs!

D8 Exclusive! Steve Jobs uses nouns, verbs!

The whole crapdamn internet is abuzz about my amazingly probing and in-depth interview of my close, personal friend Steve Jobs yesterday at the D8 conference, which, no matter what some hacks named Dan Lyons say, I totally don’t pocket $1,000,000 a year for, and if I did, so what? I do a lot of work, asshole, I should be able to pay myself whatever I want for that work. It’s called Capitalism!

Anyway. The internet was abuzz by the soundbites out of my interview with Steve, going so far as to break it down into nearly every salient point he made! I’m going to assume that places like Engadget didn’t do this because they’re obsessive hacks who so desperately want views and clicks that they’d break up a relatively short interview into about 2-dozen news articles, but because they want it to be easier for you, the readers, to zero-in on exactly the soundbites you want to read, without needing to worry about having to read the rest of my fantabulous interview.


What hasn’t received as much coverage is the words he used to connect those other words! At several points during the interview, Steve said “the.” Breakthrough! Then he said “we,” which is a revolutionary new way of referring to more people than just himself, and proves conclusively that he cares, Ihnatko-style, about his customers.

Why are news organizations picking up on this? And what about his use of the word “Hello” at the beginning of the interview? Do you really think any other CEO in the entire world would start off an interview with “Hello?” Fuck you, not they wouldn’t.

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