Support Mosspuppet with money!
Dearest fans,
As you know, my amazing, game-changing soundboard app is currently getting no love from Apple. I’m sure that my close, personal friend Steve Jobs will clear up this misunderstanding and put it up on the site, so that you can go and buy it and giggle like a happy little girl at being able to sound like me, but in the mean time, you can’t. More important than that, you can’t currently give me money.
I know that goddamn sucks, because you wanted to do that thing. So what if you want to still send me money even without getting my app in return? Well, good news, you handsome bastards, because now you can! Just click on the link below to send me money via PayPal. (if you want to do this directly, you can send PayPal funds to mosspuppet@gmail.com)
To sweeten the deal, I’ll tell anyone who gives me $10 or more to shut up in my next video. Pretty sweet deal, right? Don’t delay; line my pockets today!
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Walt Mosspuppet: Tech News and Opinion 
Hi Mosspuppet, I think you are wonderful. I really need Stephen’s help. There is a woman named Sekineh who has been sentenced to death by stoning in Iran. My friends and I are organizing a protest in Peterborough Ont. Canada (eh) on Aug. 28 at 2pm. We don’t know how to promote it so it gets enough publicity to make Worlk Leaders listen. You know how to do that. If you can help us, I will name a room in my hospice (just being constructed – not yet operating) the Stephen Colbert room, and reserve it for members of the religious right who contract a fatal disease from a sexual partner they claim to not be dating. And of course, any fans of yours who need a safe, loving environment for their last few precious days. Thanks so much.